Day 14 - French Nostalgia

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One day to halfway...not that I am counting.

I get nostalgic a lot, especially when I am alone (which is pretty much all the time), about my childhood and days gone past. 

 When I was younger me and my family would go to France every year on holiday, we would stay in a caravan and rent bikes, learn to swim, go on adventures. My earliest memory of France is being quite young, maybe 7/8 and my Mum and Dad teaching me how to ask at the bakery for 2 baguettes please....and the only reason I remember this so well is because

I repeated the phrase in my head over and over again "deux baguettes s'il vous plait, deux baguattes s'il vous plait, deux baguettes s'il vous plait" until I reached the little bakery, which was probably on the resort, but I felt older and responsible for getting lunch in a foreign country. Well I spent so much time memorising the phrase that I managed to forget how to get back to the caravan! I remember panicking and worrying, not knowing where to go. I found it...eventually, having achieved my goal.

There was also one time...."this one time at band camp" (everytime...thanks American Pie) there was a little lake to go fishing, and this was the manly thing to do. So my brother, younger than me, got himself a little fishing rod, think it was made out of bamboo, to be part of the fishing crew and he was so excited, got himself all set up and ready. He must have got distracted...or bored......it was definitely boredom....the fish bit and he was pulled into the water! My Dad just dipped his hand in the water and pulled him out by the ankles....it makes me laugh every time I think about it. Poor Boy.....never really took to fishing after that!

Then there was the water slides, it felt like we actually looked forward to seeing what they would be like, bigger and faster than the year before, how many people could go down them all at one time. I also learned to swim in France, and so did my brother. Time would just fly by some days by the pool, we would make friends, challenge each other to go down the slide a bit faster, jump in a little farther or higher. One day, we were a little older by this point, we were out on our bikes and discovered a resort with even bigger slides. I think there was six of us and we hid our bikes across the road and sneaked into the bigger better pool and had so much fun even though we were all terrified of getting thrown out!

We could be in France for up to three weeks at a time and every time it just got better and better, the last time we went it was with two other families, six kids....a holiday romance, injury by bike, barbecues, jenga, late nights in and out of caravans and tents, live music, long ferry journeys, getting lost on the wrong side of the road, hair braids and friendship bracelets exchanged with promises of never taking them off!

I could keep going and going with stories, but I better actually wash my dishes, like a good Mother.

I often wonder if nostalgia is our mind making our memories better so that we believe life is not as good now but when it comes to thinking about France I truly believe that those days were the best, truly the best of my childhood.

Rachel Rose.x

Day 10 - Sun

I'm stuck now, why did I agree to this challenge from Kale and Cigarettes. I am not a writer, never have been. I mean I can write a poem or two now and again, but daily writing....what the hell did I sign up to this for. I don't even reach the 500 words everyday...Fuck!

It will just be boring to write about my day, saying that, its been a pretty good day. The sun came out (It's Scotland...need I say more.) and it always seems to make the day a little better, makes it feel less heavy. Rain and black clouds are heavy, really heavy when that is all you have seen for almost 8 months.....why do I live in Scotland again? For the sun of course d'uh! (I often swim in sarcasm just to keep it topped up).

 But the sun, that is a whole other feeling. Light...as in light as a feather, fresh and things look more blue, green, warm, blooming.....even nature is overwhelmed with gratitude when the sun is out. Yellow is the colour of optimism, it can stimulate the mind and spark creative ideas, I often find this. I am more creative and productive when the sun is out. I want to be outside, walking, running or just sitting somewhere with my eyes closed and feeling the heat on my skin....the beach is the best when I am not in this country. 6 weeks and I will be on a plane....to a beach...the countdown is on! Its been on for a while now.

 Back to my day...really....is this all I have to write about, why can't I write something profound, witty and with intention. Maybe I do have a little intention, I mean I sat down and intended to write. I am lacking inspiration today.....the sun is out. I want to go outside and not be writing but I also want to write it right now so I can stop thinking about it, tick it off the to do list for the day. Let the thought of it float away and not come back...until tomorrow and the 19 days after that! Positive thought...once the 19 days are over I get to countdown in days, minutes...seconds (I went too far....right??) how long it will be until I land in sunshine....the real sun, you know the one where no clouds exist round it, or getting in the way of it. Scotland comes with clouds, its a given...its when there is only one cloud in the sky, not even hot sun, just sun, the Scottish feel the need to strip down to short shorts and bikinis to then complain its too hot....well....those are the ones that have not experienced the real sun, the sun close to the equator, the sun that has magic powers that help you drift in and out of thoughts more easily, that allow you to float into daydreaming, especially if you have the sound of the waves tumbling in and out. That's the sound of calm for me, that's what I crave and I crave it often. I get a high from the sun, a happy buzz, I want to do cartwheels and go on adventures, eat ice cream, experiment in my photography and eagerly anticipate how spectacular the sunset will be. 

 After my brief piece yesterday about my depression over the years I truly believe I have seasonal affective disorder. I can actually feel the sadness eroding me in early November of every year, I get really sad at that time of the year, cry a lot...cry even more when I think I am crying for no reason, pull out the warm hoodies and put the heating on for the winter. Waking up in the dark, going to work in the dark, coming home from work in the dark....its darkness...all darkness. The darkness makes me ill, in mind, body and spirit. Maybe its all of this that has attacked my physical health recently, I know they are all connected and being in a state of chaos is not helping....deep breath, keep it slow. Its time to find balance. It's May and we are all still waiting on the sun, its actually the main topic of conversation for people in this part of the world, we all have the same wish...The Sun! Well.....we have it today and I feel grateful for it...on my day off too.

  Lets get out the darkness. The Sun. I love it. I yearn for it and actually need it in my life. I connect with it in some way. It sprinkles magic on the earth for all to prosper....yellow is also the colour of prosperity, because it is the closest primary colour to gold. (Yeah... there is a swimming pool to swim in full of useless knowledge too!)

My day, who cares about that really....no one ever asks me how my day is anyway. The sun is out, its time to take the boy on a long walk in grateful nature and ease my thoughts and wait to be sun stoned.....or just a little from, you know, the Scottish sun. I hold out for the sun of this summer in a beautiful place and hopefully surrounded by beautiful people....the ones who don't need to ask me about my day because they are part of it, walking beside me in the light.

Rachel Rose.x

Day 6 - Festival Fun

This weekend I was invited to Volksfling Festival to face paint. Volksfling is a car show for Volkswagen and let me tell you, I have never seen so many VW Campervans in one place before. (and of course all the other VW'S you can get!!) This is held at Biggar, near Edinburgh!

It was so busy with families and fun. I was there for two days and think I painted over 200 faces.

When I go to events like this I truly enjoy it, it was amazing to be there and be a small part of it all. I love seeing people happy and having fun, by the time I closed up my stall on the Saturday night all the campers were cooking dinner on barbecues and chilling in the early evening sun. By the Sunday my inner hippy emerged and I had bought flowers for my hair and got myself a beautiful henna tattoo!

One of my dreams is to buy a Campervan and go round all the festivals face painting. A pipe dream maybe but when I talk to traders that is what they do and they all seem to love it.

I love meeting new people and over the years face painting I have built up more confidence and always make sure to go and talk to people and they always open my mind more, to ways of living and about life and making the most of it. They embrace the uncertainty of whether their trade will go well that weekend or not and if it doesn't they feel grateful and happy to be able to be part of these events. They travel the whole country and must meet some great people along the way as well as making a living. It truly is like living like a nomad!

Mmmmm....Maybe I should consider it, bite the bullet and make a big change in my life. Love what you do and you will never work a day in your life!

Now to figure out how to incorporate face painting and yoga into a career?!?!?!

Here are some photos!

(Squeezed in some Yoga)

Rachel Rose.x

Not all who wander are Lost......

My Trip to Venice, Italy