Day 4 - Anger

Anger is a very overwhelming and confusing emotion, especially when you feel anger towards the ones you love and are closest to. You need to release the anger but not hurt them in the process, tricky tricky. I held on to the anger for a long long time, not even knowing it was building up, no awareness of it accumulating in me and then....bang....it hit me. I felt in shock and fuzzy (It's a word...honest). I have always held a little anger towards myself (still trying to figure that one out!) but I felt really strong anger towards myself.....all because I felt anger towards others. I wanted to get it all out of me knowing that it is an emotion that you cannot leave running through your system. 

I have worked through this alone, not knowing if that is a good thing or a bad thing. I have done some forgiving, in my heart. Yes, that includes being in the process of forgiving myself too. 

I had to get it out........

Leaving

I feel it running through my veins, toxic, heated.

Nowhere to go but circulating, bubbling and boiling.

It's not even just a simmer, it's heat is pulsating,

a force unbidden yet unseen.

Searching for answers to release it, to feel cleansed

To halt the internal poisoning.

But coming up short as my mind is racing,

And ranting, relentless and frustrating.

I must clear my mind, my feelings and find it in me somewhere.

To forgive, to set free, to release, cleanse....purifying.

Sit on it, meditate on it, calm the chaos.

Slow down and stop the chasing.

Just feel, don't think. Take a breath.

And another. Releasing and freeing.

Watch it float away in the breeze.

Unrelenting and distancing.

I felt you, I felt you anger. I don't need you anymore.

I feel you leaving.

Pinterest

Rachel Rose.x

Day 3 - This too shall Pass

The story of 2015 so far has been a challenging one, think this has been my most challenging year to date, not a year of terrible things happening but of going inwards and really finding out things about myself I had to address. (Does this happen to anybody else when they turn 30?....nope, just me then!!) I have needed to let go, or at least try to learn to. I am currently learning to open my heart more and, with this current challenge, write from my heart, and to not hide in my shell so much (Yes, my star sign is Cancer).

This year an array of emotions have washed over me on a daily basis and these emotions have been chaotic, difficult to settle and ease. They have consisted of anger initially, anger from within then into despair and panic at having been so angry. I have experienced this emotion, if only briefly, but not to this extent and for an extended period of time. I have felt disheartened and dismayed at the prospect of a potentially good year very quickly going downhill but then realising it may just be the start of some life changes that are needed.

I started the year with great intentions, a list of New Year’s resolutions and high hopes to make this a busy and exciting year. This very quickly diminished with worries about health in my family, upset with two of my closest friends.... losing one and pushing the other one away, my Son not settling at school, starting a new job and feeling very isolated and alone.

I thank all the moons of this year, what have we had?....a couple of new moons, a new moon in Scorpio, a blood moon and an eclipse and we are now in a Mercury retrograde.(cough cough, just read an article about playing victim to the retrograde...Its my excuse and I'm keeping it!!) I believe I am a moon child, this universe is having an impact on me this year and I think I have felt it more from connecting inwardly through yoga, meditation and all the reading I do, thank you elephant journal!!

This, somewhat, leaves me with a positive spin on it because my mantra thus far has been “This too shall pass”, this mercury retrograde is still in flow and continuing through to the 11^th June and in that time I know for me it is important to open my heart to new and exciting things, of connecting on a spiritual level and knowing that yes...this too shall pass.....while I dread the thought of another retrograde later in the year. I am, realistically, both positive and pessimistic at the same time...oh how I long to be the optimist.

2015 may just be the jump start I need to find my passions, or purpose and to seek those things more inwardly and connecting more.

Pinterest

Rachel Rose.x

Day 2 - Mental Health

Day 2 - My assigment

I have recently been studying an online course called Mental Health and Psychology : Nature vs Nurture with the University of Liverpool here. This course is for 6 weeks and this week, which is week 5, we had a 500 word assignment, this is mine.  How fitting for my 500 words a day.

Maintaining your Mental Health.

There are many factors which can negatively influence a person’s mental health with relevant and appropriate strategies to alleviate these factors. I am going to look at 3 factors and example strategies for each.

The earliest factor to consider is pre-conception and the pre-natal period. This period is highly significant and teenage pregnancy plays its part in mental health issues occurring after the birth of the baby with a high risk of the baby then developing mental health issues in childhood, adolescence and adulthood.  During the pregnancy, especially in adolescent pregnancy, risk taking behaviours, such as smoking, drinking alcohol and taking drugs, may contribute to the factors which can negatively influence both the adult and baby’s mental health.  

The 2^nd factor I am going to look at is the effects of Childhood trauma on mental health as an adolescent and adult. In research in recent years it has been discovered that traumatic events in childhood have a lasting negative influence on an adult’s mental health. There are lasting consequences from experiencing trauma as a child, such as sexual abuse or physical abuse, the main being Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)  which can arise in the late teen years and adulthood.

The final factor negatively influencing a person’s mental health can be the “work-life balance” (WHO, 2012) as an adult. There are detriments to mental health in a stressful work environment and not spending enough time with friends and family. On the other end of the scale unemployment has a negative influence on mental health with higher death rates. On both ends of the scale people may then disengage with leisure activities increasing negatives affects on well being and mental health.

 Early intervention and prevention is a vital strategy for the pre-conception and the pre-natal period, starting with education for young parents to be, one particular group is Mellow Parenting which involves an element of the programme called Mellow Bumps. Mellow Bumps is an engagement programme to promote early attachment with bump and preparation for labour with relaxation. That is just one example of a parenting group, but the World Health organisation (2012) states the importance of parent training and natal care. This early intervention may be vital to influence promotion of good self care enhancing a person’s mental health, therefore alleviating the negative influence on Mother and baby’s mental health in the future.  The 2^nd and 3^rd factors may require more intervention psychologically but also taking into account Peter Kinderman’s five ways to wellbeing. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) is one strategy and the Charity, Mind, explains “CBT is learning to break the cycle of negative thinking”. This is carried out with a trained therapist and can be a successful way to overcome symptoms of PTSD.  There also other intervention available, CBT is just one option.  Self- Help can be a very important strategy and using the five ways to well being can have a significant effect on Mental Health in general, PTSD and stressful work environments and unemployment. The five ways to well being include; getting active, giving, maintaining relationships, keep the mind active and be mindful. Self- care can empower and motivate people to overcome negative feelings of mental health and PTSD.

This is a very brief overview of factors which can negatively influence a person’s mental health with strategies for each. There are, however, many more factors as is strategies.

WHO (2012).  Risks to Mental Health: An overview of vulnerabilities and risk factors.

 Background paper by who secretariat for the development of

a comprehensive mental health action plan.

Kinderman P (2014) A Prescription for Psychiatry: Why We Need a

Whole New Approach to Mental Health and Wellbeing. Palgrave Macmillan.

London. pp 110-113.

NHS Confederation Fact Sheet (2011).

http://blog.humangivens.com

www.mind.org.uk

www.mellowparenting.org

www.brp.org.uk

I received some really good feedback...I am so pleased.

Rachel Rose.x

#500wordsaday

Day 1 - 500 words a day.

Day 1 – 500 words a day writing experiment

Thanks to inspiration from a blog by Kirk Henlser I have decided to take the 500 words per day for 30 days challenge.

The rules for the challenge are as follows (as written on the blog) –

“1) Write 500 words per day on any subject for any reason at any time for 30 CONSECUTIVE days.

(Failure to write 500 words per day for 30 straight days won’t cause you any bodily harm in the way of our bodyguards coming to your house and going after you with the belt strap but it will emotionally confirm your own fears of your inability to follow through on the simplest of tasks so my suggestion is to suck it up and even if you have to hit the “f” key 500 times and post that and call it a poem on the foundation for the word fuck then do that before you no-show).

2) Post your 500 words on Facebook and tag @kaleandcigarettes and #500wordsaday.

(This is the scary part, sharing your writing, because a lot of us, if not all, think that we actually quite suck at writing and that people will hate our guts for our thoughts but the reality here, and the whole value of this experiment, is working through that fear and realizing the only time we’re ever happy with our work is when we write from the heart). ((Pss – this takes practice. No shortcuts. Just the work)). -End scene-

Numero Tres) Maybe we’ll have a “group” on FB. I’m not sure yet the consequences of this action. Standby.

–

Long story short – this is really easy. And what will happen is the development of your writing craft and your ability to decipher the difference between bullshit writing and writing from the heart.” Kirk Hensler.

(So this whole sharing on Facebook idea would be the most challenging thing for me as I’m one of those “in the closet” bloggers, not one for sharing this little space I have yet.) Maybe sharing on Google+ will be a start for me!!

I like the end, writing from the heart. This reflects on my previous post, this is a challenge to follow through on Just Write….

I think it is important to challenge yourself and this is something that will be good for me, to empty my monkey mind on a daily basis. They do say a habit is created in 21 days so here goes.

I will be kind to myself too and on the days it is too hard to write I will share some of my photography or creativity, bravely and wholeheartedly.

Rachel Rose.x

#500wordsaday

Just Write.....

I started this blog in the hope that I would be encouraged and motivated to write yet I have found myself completely stuck on what to write, where to look for inspiration and how to be true to myself.

Pinterest

"Write what your heart tells you"....What does my heart tell me??

 I know what my head tells me....it tells me that I am confined by the rules of language, grammar and spelling. I have always had doubts about my writing and this was reinforced at university when I would fail not on my content or research but on my ability to write plain old English. I need to set myself free from my own restraints, my own beliefs I have created and maintained over the years. I need to find my focus, the focus on my imagination. I like to write but my capacity to write wavers. I need to let go of all that. I need to grow and evolve and write what my heart tells me.

My heart wants to connect, My heart wants to be inspired yet inspire others. I want to share in the good times...like my upcoming travels but also on the down days when a poem or the need to write comes to me. My heart loves to be creative, to take photos when out for a walk or when I am out working (Face Painting). Maybe I should start to share more, actually use this blog that I created as my own little space and if someone reads it great but if not then I will have released whats in my heart...set it free, let it go. Letting go of what no longer serves me.

This is now my goal...a small step into becoming more of me, more of my truth. I will write.....Just write.

Rachel Rose.x

Not all who wander are Lost......

My Trip to Venice, Italy

LifeBoxFoodco

I recently discovered a new company LifeBoxFoodCo, this company launched with September "food boxes" delivered to your door. Not only are they just food boxes but boxes full of natural healthy food. This is a great way of being introduced to brands which deliver organic, natural and healthy alternatives to the "western diet" of processed foods. 

This was a great find on my journey to health, taking small steps to make big changes in my life and I was really excited that I found this company and their ethos of "It is the food you furnish to your mind that determines the whole character of your life" (Emmet Fox).

When my box arrived I could not wait to open it and see what was inside, but on opening the packaging the first thing I discovered was;

A personalised handwritten tag, I feel this is a rare and special thing these days, as you just get used to receiving  printed invoices...which end up straight in the bin or in a pile of papers (Just in case you need to return something). This really made me smile and because it was so personalised it makes you want to "Tag us in your pics!" (which I did of course!). This will be a little tag I hang with my collection of tags, postcards and random titbits!

The box was much larger that I thought it was going to be, I am sure in my mind I was expecting small samples of the products but no, it was the second surpirse.

On opening the box I discovered two cards inside, one was a "menu" and the other was a "warm welcome".

And.....when I flipped over the menu there was a "recipe idea" which was called the Lifebox "power of prevention" smoothie!

What a great idea to put this in as it can be added to my recipes for smoothies and I love the idea of trying a "smoothie bowl". I think a smoothie bowl would give you a sensation of consuming a meal rather than drinking it.

I chose the everyday Lifebox and I am really happy with my purchase.

My menu was:

Coconut water with Aloe Vera

Urban Acai (100% organic Acai powder)

Pukka Vitalise Sachet

Conscious Raw chocolate bar

Itsu Seaweed Thins

Rude health Granola

Inspiral Kale chips

Kombucha green tea

Baobab Sachet

Pukka Tea sachets

Lifebox everyday Morning cleanse mix

(Cayenne, Tumeric and Cinnamon)

Lifebox Nuts on the go

(Almonds and Mulberries)

I really liked that this company are introducing you to brands you have maybe not heard of before but incorporating popular ones such as pukka, I do love my pukka teas and thoroughly enjoyed both I received. I also loved that LifeBox added to the menu with their own products, the morning cleanse mix will be great added to a smoothie and the nuts are a great snack! I can't wait to see what else they bring out.

I feel I have discovered a treasure of a company and they have put so much work into not only their boxes, with the extras they pop in there, and yes personalised tags and recipe ideas are classed as extras to me!, but into their own branding and the way they can introduce people to a new way of trying out new things and making small changes to their diet a step at a time. It does feel special to receive a box full of goodies (healthy goodies of course) and I feel they have got it spot on.

I am really excited to see what they bring out in December as this box will make a fantastic gift for christmas and I am really tempted to try the children's box for my son as he would be very excited to receive a box in the mail! (it would be like christmas coming early). Yes, I know I know it is far too early to be mentioning Christmas in October!

Saying that, LifeBoxFoodCo have just launched their October boxes....I am off to see what they have in this month!

"The small box, creating a BIG life change"

Find them here:

www.lifeboxfood.com

www.twitter.com/lifeboxfood

instagram/lifeboxfoodco

Enjoy!

Rachel Rose x